I was lying on my bed...staring on the ceiling...
...and thinking deeply of what you were trying to consult me last night...
I know it damn well too, you're always there when i need you...
...and even sacrificing your precious time and sleeping hours...
...to talk to a wood like me...
Dunno since when, i become so ignorant and hurting you all the time...
...and worst of all, i don't even noticing that...
It is really not fair...
...not fair at all for you to care for such terrible person like me...
I was thinking...am i really born to have a heart of stone?
I never notice i am actually such a terrible person...until you told me so...
I really dunno how to care nor to love the people around me...
I really dunno why...
I know i should be very grateful
...because even if i am such a terrible person...
...people like you, my beloved families, my lovely bro and even my sir...
...are always there to concern about me...
I really should...and i really will
...learn to care and love the people around me more...
...maybe not by words...but definitely by actions...
I know myself very well
If i know of someone that really cares and loves me with their true heart
I will do the same too
But my actions could be indirectly and less obvious...
...but that's just me...
Lastly, to my beloved bro
Even if i can't find a true love in my entire life...
...like what you said, "there's no true love in this realistic world"...
I won't really care less
What most important to me is
~true love from my families and friends~